Dear Anonymous,
I love to receive comments on my blog. If I had no comments I probably would have packed the whole blog thing in way back. Sometimes I reply by mail, sometimes I leave a reply below the comment box, but often I’m sorry to say I don’t have the time.
Why? Well the reason depends on which camp you are in:
The only downside to the anon comments from the ‘good’ readers, is that I cannot reply directly to your lovely comments! So if you’d like to receive replies from me or from other blogs you visit: how about creating an email address under a pseudonym that is kept separate from your regular email and used just for surfing blogs?
This way bloggers like myself could write to thank you for your lovely comment without ever invading your personal space. ♥♥♥♥
OK, everyone has a right to their opinion, but in my book, if you’re not brave enough to put a name to what you think, you’d be better keeping quiet! If you don’t like what is written on a blog, then either put your case politely and SIGN the message, or keep your opinion to yourself and move right along.
So please tell me, I’d love to know, was I right to say it all out loud?!
154 comments
And how about registered lurkers like myself? 😀 I'm not shy to register and I know that comments are the important part in the blogging world, but… I'm shy. Shy of my inability to express myself in a proper English (and no, French is not my native either) so I am somehow a parasite too like an anonymous poster. They at least bother to write :). So please do not be too harsh to the silent ones like myself,some of us are parasites by reason.
Your blog is marvelous, I stop here every day, enjoying it tremendously and I suspect I'm not alone. 🙂
Of course you're right! This is your space, and you are always so respectful. If there's anyone that doesn't like your wonderful words and pictures, they should go away and respect one of the greatest blogs we love to read everyday. Thank you for all you share with all of us. Bon weekend! Ana.
Thank you Ann! Of course I'm not being harsh! And I know that many people like to read silently, I have no problem with that. I'm certainly not forcing people to leave a comment. It's just that some anon comments are so lovely that I'd like to reply directly and privately rather than out in public.
PS I think your English is excellent!
Thank you Ana, you are very generous.
x
Couldn't have put it better myself.
Thank you for speaking on behalf of THOUSANDS, I'm sure.
Joasia x
I have never allowed anon comments. The way I figure it, it is very easy to have an online persona that totally protects your privacy, so there is no reason for anonymous comments unless (duh duh duuuuuuh), you are just wanting to leave a snarky comment. I don't have time for the drama, so no anonymous comments are allowed. Just my two cents worth…
Judy
Agreed!
And what is UP with the spam commenting? It's downright annoying for sure.
I have to have anon comments, for all my non bloggin friends who love to leave comments, but they always SAY who they are, but I do allow them – if the spam ever got bad enough I would get rid of that option, but there's too many out there who need it right now (as well as I.)
Thank you Joasia, you reassure me 🙂
Hi Judy, I don't want to ban anon comments, because I know that some readers really are more comfortable that way, but the spam is becoming seriously annoying!
Aha! So I'm not the only one! I certainly didn't use to receive as much as I get at the moment, it's maddening. They mostly target the same back posts, and leave long spam in all sorts of languages, even in other scripts.
Surely they could find better things to do with their time?!
have a great weekend
x
I agree Sharon… if readers are not interested in content there is no obligation to continue… click off… That is what I do and that is what I expect others to do on my blog if I am not to their taste… No one can like all things all the time…
I respect the work of others and just because it may not be to my liking I would never insult them or their work by leaving a nasty comment… I don't understand who has the time for this in any case…
As for spam… I have recently found a good filter .. if you would like the name… email me and I will tell you… it has worked well for me…
xv
Your current policy sounds fine to me. I'll admit that my first thought upon reading your post was "What in the world could anyone object to on 'My French Country Home'?".
As for "Ann X"?…. I read her self-doubting comment and immediately recalled a chronic phenomenon (sp?) in my former life as an English professor. Whenever I gave an essay an "A", the student's response would almost always be a variation on "I got an A?…I thought the paper had some real problems…" or "Really?…I didn't think it was that good..".
I invariably told the student "Well, that's probably WHY you got a good grade. I wish more of your classmates had your attitude."
Which is to say that Sharon is, once again, right; your English is just fine, "Ann X".
Not entirely by the way?…There's a deeply funny scene in the Meryl Streep movie "Plenty" in which a very formal, retiring British ambassador encounters the Thai ambassador (whose tiny,silent, disconcertingly non-stop-smiling wife is beside him) at a formal reception. The ambassador (who's rather fed up with the entire evening) gently corrects the Thai ambassador on a grammatical point.
the Thai ambassador grins wildly and announces (LOUDLY) "OH, Honored Sir! The English language, she is a difficult mistress to master, no? But you take a stick and BEAT the bitch into submission!!!!".
No one in the room knows exactly what to say in response to that comment.
In any case, I've always thought the remark served as pretty reliable advice. It's as good as any other I've heard in 30-something years of teaching English
Level Best as Ever,
David "Shy R Not Us" Terry
http://www.davidterryart.com
Thank you Vicki, I'm sending you a mail asap, and by the way I LOVE your photos of the Pierre de Ronsard in your garden today!
HI David
I never knew that you taught! I bet it was fun taking lessons with you!
Thank you for your lovely comment and for being such a regular reader
bon weekend
xx
P.S. Dominique Browning, on her blog "Slow Love Life) had the same problem. oa while there, she had no idea that someone/thing was absolutely filling back posts' comments sections with really filthy (if not terribly original) pornography. you could write to Dominique and ask what filter she's now using.
Sincerely,
D. Terry
Thank you very much for bringing this out. The point of sharing our blogs to the wide world is to share positive things out there. If other people do not share that point of view or doesn't appreciate the beauty in those things then too bad. They should move on. Life is too short. I love your blog.
Thanks for the tip David
Life is indeed too short Pamela, thank you for stopping by and bon weekend!
xx
Bravo – well said Sharon. I totally agree with the sentiment left by most of the other comments too – if one doesn't like something – simply move on. There is absolutely no obligation to carry on reading, and certainly no obligation to comment at all – particularly if one doesn't have anything good to say!
By the way, I think that your blog is marvelous – one of the first ones that encouraged me to start blogging myself!
Paula x
Love David Terry's anecdote.
There are some poor souls, new to blogging, who can't figure out all the options. They go to post a lovely comment and open the 'Comment as: ' and are met with a bewildering profile list. What is AIM, Type pad, Live Journal, URL? Should they use their name? It is so perplexing but Anonymous, ah, that is safe, I understand that one. This is why some people, I used to be amongst them, use Anon.
I can't speak though for those who leave nasty comments or other nuisance posts. That is just the way of cowards and bullies and I too wish they would go away.
You just got an "Amen" in Texas. Why do people do this? Sure I take a few minutes to read blogs – I learn, am entertained, etc., but who on earth has the time to do the virus thingys? What a waste! If folks only realized we've all got a limited time to live – why on earth spend it destroying (or trying to destory) other people's work. I must stop now or I'll start ranting.
Thanks for bringing this up! (I have recently discovered your blog, and it is beautiful!) I am constantly amazed at the visceral comments I read on the internet (not so much in the home decor and lifestyle blogging world, thank goodness.) It is as if there is now a public forum in which to spew every nasty thought and word. It is really so uncivilized and unkind, so often displaying discontent and envy. Didn't our mothers tell us, "If you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing at all?"
On some blogs, the computer won't let me post in any other format…tells me I'm not allowed to post when I choose another format, like google. So in order to get my post on, I have to use anonymous. So not all of us have a choice. But when I'm forced to do this, I always sign my name.
yes, Sharon….I went off to college in 1978 and never stopped going to school until 1993 (the authorities at various institutions kept paying me to go, so I kept going). I ended up with five degrees in Literature/Linguistics. These days, I can TELL when folks are thinking "What use is all that education?". I'm the first to say that, if nothing else, going to gradskool for that long is a very effective way of neatly avoiding all the usual responsibilities of a normal, adult life (marriage, children, a "regular" job, taxes,mortgages, etcetera).
I taught at boarding schools (very fun) and Duke University (surprisingly irritating when it wasn't boring…so, I quit and changed careers at age 35 or so).
We'll just have to wait and see how things turn out in the end……my parents are still relatively hopeful about the matter.
Level Best as Ever,
David Terry
http://www.davidterryart.com
I appreciate that you took the time to address all of your commenters. I receive mostly good comments, spam too often, and over the years, I've received a handful of ugly comments, which, in my opinion were just plain ugly and I can't help but think the ugly commenters are hyper critical, random visitors who are not my regular followers, and, yes, they were usually anonymously written.
Mandy
Thank you Paula, your comments are always so generous and encouraging! Is it as hot in Norfolk as in Normandy today?
xx
I know you're right Melissa, thank you for underlining that. The whole sign in procedure can be a pain but at least once it is done, then it needs no more attention.
bon weekend
x
Rant, rant! go ahead, I have nothing against a ranter that's for sure!
best wishes
xx
Hi Sharon,
Well said – I do love your blog and all things french. Hope I make to your neck of the woods and your guest cottage with my girlfriends someday!
Jane
Thank you for your kind words, and yes, you are right, some of the stuff out there is better left unread.
Thank you Laura, that is helpful, hope you didn't feel got at ! 🙂
bon weekend
x
I'm so glad that your parents are still hopeful David, I'll bear that in mind if one of my offspring gets hooked on lifelong academics!
HI Jane, I would love that! Thank you for reading the blog and for your kind comment
bon weekend
Sharon
x
Thank you Mandy, it was tricky to write this without targeting the wrong bunch!
Haven't commented in awhile as I've been so busy, but I hate that you have to go through such drama…you are so generous to give us such gorgeous snippets of France that I relish looking at everyday! Wishing you would be at Giverny taking pictures when I visit your area this fall!:) The downside of being with a group is that I can't visit and stop by your French country home! Take Care!
Hi Sharon…
You said it well…and I appreciate you taking the time to express your thoughts so eloquently and diplomatically. I was experiencing a lot of spam too and had to disable anonymous comments…which has helped tremendously. I am enjoying your blog so much and hope that these annoyances don't take the pleasure out of it for you…please carry on! 🙂
Good for you!
You're too sweet Laura, I know that the spam mail annoys most bloggers, I don't even understand why they do it, since it never gets aired!
Will you be treasure hunting this weekend? Here we get another long weekend, so I could go Saturday, Sunday and Monday if I wish, but I'm not sure I'll have the stamina! 🙂
Thank you!
HI Delaine
Don't worry, there's no real drama, just the spam mail annoying me and taking up my time unnecessarily.
Giverny in the fall will be stunning, who knows I may bump into you!
best wishes
Sharon
I think you were actually kind in what you had every reason to voice. I am amazed how lately I'm seeing some bloggers who have real complaints asking if it was alright to voice them…of course you do, and too bad for those who cannot hear it with discernment or compassion. Say it and say it loud and clear. Spammers and those described as leaving scripts and other nonsense are planted annoyances no one needs in their lives, they are troubled and sick, best to get rid of them quick. 😀
Yeah, the spam is incredibly annoying. Do they REALLY think it will: 1. be read, or 2. re-posted? Arghh!!!!
Very well said! I totally agree. Anonymous is ok..but I always feel it's so one sided…I can't visit their blog, get to know them or put a name with a face. The mean comments are just silly….and yes, cowardly…and obviously jealousy driven.
Very well said, I agree completely….These kind of comments took my blog spirit away for a while….
Hugs
Erna
Sorry you've been getting those horrible anon comments and spam lately. It seems to grow as a blog gains in popularity. Haven't commented recently, as I've had so little time, but do stop by and read everyday. Always a treat.
Good post. I am lucky that I don't seem to get negative comments, a few political ones which I deleted. Like Laura I find some blogs difficult to comment on except as anon.
I've had some nasty comments on my writings, but, after fuming a bit and getting over the initial hurt reaction, I console myself by remembering the saying "I refuse to have a battle of wits with someone who is unarmed," delete their vitriol,and brush it off.
Your blog is superb, so just brush it all off as soon as you can. It's all coming from those who are very lacking in wit. Your blog today said it all very well. Thank you!
Oh comme c'est injuste votre blog est tellement beau, tellement généreux et riches que je ne peux croire que certains l'abîment. Je fais partie de ces anonymes qui vous lisent sans vous laisser de messages d'encouragement car je n'ai pas de blog et peu de temps c'est vrai aussi. Mais je profite de votre annonce pour vous dire combien vous êtes précieuse pour moi, j'aime votre manière de vivre une vie et parfois même je donne en dictée à mes enfants certains passages qui sont splendides à lire, à comprendre et à méditer. Je souhaite du fond du coeur que vous écriviez encore très longtemps et vous remercie encore pour tt ce que vous m'apportez par l'intermédiaire de vos photos, vos mots, votre manière d'être qui est rare car pleine de poésie, de bon sens et d'amour pour tt et ts ceux qui vous entourent. Merci et bisous à vous
I am having a difficult time understanding why anyone could leave a negative comment about your blog, Sharon. I am pleased that you have addressed the situation in today's post. Keep in mind…when you receive the negative or mean spirited comment…that there is a distant friend that lives in a modest home in the Pacific Northwest of America that has embraced your inspirational words and images. (Perhaps not proper grammar from me at times.) When I leave a comment, I speak from the heart!
~Lynne
w/L.
No you are so right! It's very important to me that I stand behind any of my comments. While I understand why people comment annonymously -to many times they use it as a shield to spew out vitriole that they would never put their name to or say outloud!
Of course.
Hallelujah! And bravo because goodness knows I wouldn't have been able to have expressed those thoughts in nearly so polite a manner. You, like so many of the special people on the blogosphere give your whole heart to what you want to do. Just the thought of someone leaving anything even remotely negative, even a vague hint of unkindness, gets me worked up until there is steam coming out of my ears. I get them too and it is just mind-boggling. As for the spam, I highly doubt that the dude in China that is writing about his "lingerie sale" (that is one I got today) is reading this post but one can continue to dream that it will all just go away or be active and use Vicki's filter!
Thanks for speaking your peace,
Bon weekend!
Heather
Bravo!
Yes! you were right to say it and I am glad you did.
The only time I feel OK about doing something anonymously, is when I donate something.
I have never understood those who are entertained by being destructive. People who create/spread viruses, leave nasty comments or are amused by the seamy side of life. I can't imagine allowing myself to fill my time and thoughts with poison.
As for spam. It was my understanding that robots left or sent most of that.
I may not always comment on every post but I read them and enjoy them all. XXX
I say Giddy Up!!!! Well put!!!! Isn't it a bit easier to be nice? Each morning I look forward to viewing your pictures and reading you words. You inspire me!
Pj Carlson
Sharon – well done, you! My sentiments exactly. I'm going to refer to this again the future 🙂
Yes + thank you for saying! Am new to your blog but love it. xxpeggybraswelldesign.com
I agree with you Sharon.
Sorry to hear about the nasty comments and funny thing they are always anonymous commenters.
To those I say…quit hiding in anonymity and come out for us to see the real you.
Unless of course you are too embarrassed to be identified.
I agree with everything you said. I also know that I have a friend who reads my blog but has trouble getting her comments to post. She is anonymous so she has to jump through hoops. English isn't her first language although she tries to comment in English. Then, after spending a long time trying to get it right in English… it won't post. So, she just doesn't. And I don't blame her. You may be getting some followers in that category as well.
Sharon,
I'm so sorry to hear you having problems with anon comments and negative views. I wonder why people even bother to leave a comment if it is fused with negativity or spam. I adore your blog and look forward to it every morning. It is filled with interesting, and informative information as well as beautiful and delightful images.
Most people who blog are aware of blog etiquette and respond in a kind and appreciative way. For those of you who don't, it would be best if you didn't comment at all.
Thanks so much for wording this in such a positive light despite the negativity that it has caused you! You are a class act!
Remember when your Mother used to say 'if you don't have something nice to say, DO NOT'. A good lesson indeed. I believe that there is always a polite way of making a point.
Sharon, well put …..and thank you for saying {and printing} what many bloggers feel. Bravo.
Thank you from all of us Sharon!
You are the best!!!
XO
Hello Miss,
I know it can be such a pain to receive spam. I finally turned off the anon comments which really helped. Now we have moved onto posting as unknown which is another favorite of mine. Fortunately for all of us we don't have to meet these unhappy people in person!
Have a wonderful weekend!
Christina
Greige
Hi Sharon
There are just some nasty people out there that
just has to say something nasty everyday!Glad
I'am not them! You have the most interesting blog ever!I read you daily I love when you take us through your country side Please keep doing what your doing. I will comment more in the future promise! It feels good to unload!
Have a great weekend
Darlene North
Adding my voice to the chorus – This internet business is the best of humankind and the worse. The best is that we form a community that reaches far beyond the confines of our immediate life, opening our eyes to thoughtful opinions of others whom without this medium, we would never have been able to enjoy intelligent discourse….and then there is the worst. It never fails to confound me how a certain group out there seems to feel that they have the right to foist their lack of manners, negativity and general bullying on the rest of us. To all those out there, Please Leave Us Alone and go on your pathetic way.
I am upset that anyone would leave unpleasant comments on such a beautiful blog. Sharon, your blog is a little respite in a world that sometimes seems crazy – and not in a good way! Keep up the good work (insert pat on back here). I enjoy everything about "My French Country Home" including reading the comments, nodding in agreement with most and chuckling over others (David, this is you today!) 🙂
Dear Sharon, I'm too late today reading your post but reading all the comments you received.I was always afraid of not being allowed to comment, as I do not know all the tricks and availibilities of blogging and commenting.That is why I write anon and signing it with name and website address. Love from the windy and cool Plain in Hungary. Dorka http://www.dorottyaudvar.co.hu
Sharon, I can't imagine anyone leaving a negative comment on your beautiful blog… that being stated, "they" must live very uncomfortable lives. One that is so miserable, that, "they" must try to share their misery with those who are not. So, continue to enjoy your lovely way of life and please always share it with us! Hugs, Laurie' ("life as it should be")
Sharon, Thanks for saying it! I couldn't agree more, and don't understand why on earth people would take the time to leave less than nice comments on a blog? There aren't enough hours in the day as it is, why waste time being nasty? And Sharon, your blog is so positive and lovely, it' unfathomable to me that someone could even think of an unkind remark to make.
I appreciate all the work you but into your blog and your honesty in talking about the darker side of blogging.
Have a lovely weekend, Jeanne
You are right on here- I often pop in, but like you, have limited time to comment. A lot of those stupid spammers are computer generated. They send out the same pre-designed post to everyone's blog and hope that it gets through to some of them. We had a trace when I was at work-thus the same people sending out the same stupid comments. Thank goodness for gmail catching spam! I also delete without reading.
As for commenting in a negative manner I think some people just need to get a life. Be kind or go find your OWN kind. Why comment at all if you can't say something positive? Crazy!
Thanks for addressing this today-it drives me nuts, too! xo Diana
You were absolutely right!!!! Some people don't understand how to set up a google account and that's why they use anon. I've put a link on my blog explaining how to set up an account and how to leave a message. As for the bad and the ugly, there is no place for them in the blog world. As another reader above said "If you can't say something nice DON'T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL!!" Amen!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks D, not sure I can get rid of them, but at least it's nice to see how many are on my side!!
x
E.X.A.C.T.L.Y!!!
Maybe you're right Betsy, I hate jealousy and will never go there.
bon weekend with all your boys 🙂
xx
Thank you Erna, bon weekend
xx
Thank you Kathy, and thank you for stopping by when you're so busy
xx
Point taken, thank you for stopping by
x
Thank you Laura, what's the saying? "bricks and stones may break my bones…."
WOW!! Merci beaucoup, votre joli commentaire qui semble être écrit du cœur me touche énormément!
De penser que mes textes soient utilisés pour des dictées me rempli de panique! Et les fautes de grammaire, et les fautes de frappe!!
Je suis d'autant plus touchée que vous êtes apparemment française, et donc j'ai eu le culot d’écrire sur votre pays, qui n'est pas le mien, et que vous trouvez néanmoins que mes mots tombent juste. Quel compliment!
Merci beaucoup et bon weekend
PS Si vous n'aviez pas écrit en anonyme, j'aurai pu vous envoyer un petit mot plus privé 🙂
You are too kind Lynne, in fact it's not the negative comments that are bothering me so much (they are very seldom received), it's the horrible spam that has me worried for the safety of my system
xx
Sharon. I'm so sorry that anonymous people are leaving such negative comments. I emailed you last month about brocantes and "rederies" in the Somme, and you took the time to reply to me and explain the difference. Knowing how busy you must be, I thought it was kind of you, and am surprised and shocked that people can be so nasty about your blog. Sad people out there! (Incidentally, I had a wonderful holiday, and found some lovely little souvenirs to bring home! So Thank you!)
You are right to say that. Your blog is one of my very favorites, so I would never have anything negative to say, but sorry that some people feel the need. I'm looking forward to all of your beautiful blogs ahead! LOVE your brocante finds!!
Thank you for "unloading"! I probably can't add anymore to all the wonderful comments and support, but I know that when I get a comment or two 🙂 I am overjoyed like a puppy that someone took the time to make a nice comment! Thank you for your incredibly delightful blog!!!
kim
You are absolutely correct for saying so…and I applaud you. Blogging takes a lot of work and dedication. Your blog takes me places I can only dream of. Please don't stop or be discouraged by the insensitive and impolite!
Of course you were right to say it out loud! I see this same sort of issue from time to time on other blogs as well. And I agree with your stance on this! I love – LOVE – your blog. I read it daily. It's just lovely. So thank you for sharing, and I hope you continue doing so. Kate in Portland, OR
The thing is you are a "special" person with nothing better to do than write a blog about your sad life……we all have better taste than you do. Really. Get real job and start living off your your husband and children.
you are an idiot.
really,. how stupid are you.
that would be STOP living off your husband and children……
I cherish my comments too..don't have that many followers and therefore comments. But in my small world I have had a couple that were either spam or something weird. But the 3 above (unless you delete them) come from a very sad or angry person who has either lost a loved one or has very little sex. Both of those things can cause a person to be mean mean mean as we say in Texas. So…get some therapy because your mean comments will show in all you do not just mean comments.
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Thank you for the sup^port! 🙂
🙂
Thank you Heather,
I will definitely be asking Vicki for the name of her filter – I didn't get the chinese lingerie message – should I feel left out?!
Thank you!
I'm sure you are right about the robots Catherine, but it doesn't make the result any less annoying!
Thank you PJ, you are too kind.
x
Thank you Bethany, looks like we are many to feel the same way
x
Thank you Peggy, and thank you for visiting so often
No courage to their convictions, that seems to be the problem – thank you for stopping by
I'm sure you are right Annette, thank you
WOW! Thank you for that last line Kris, you are very generous
xx
Thank you Katherine
Thank you Terri, I think you may have had an anon or two recently?! 🙂
Hope you have a good weekend planned
all the best
xx
Unhappy is probably the word Christina, hope all is well chez toi,
warmest
Sharon
xx
Thank you Darlene, a great example of a 'good' anon! I'd love you to comment again some time
xx
I think you are right Wendi, the world is divided when it comes to manners. Thank you fro your kind words and for reading the blog
best
Sharon
HI Dorka, I know you comment quite regularly and you count for me as one of the very good anon, please keep those lovely comments coming
Thank you Laurie, and hey look at that, the first bad anon for the day comes out of the woodwork!!
Hi Jeanne
Thank you for your kind comment, and for reading me so regularly, it's always a pleasure to have you stop by
Thank you Diana, I'm amazed at the response today, seems like I am far from being alone on this one
quite right!!
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Hi there! Yes, of course I remember your mail, I'm so glad the information was useful and that you came back with some goodies
Thank you Jan!
Thank you Kim, I shall pop over to see you
Not discouraged at all Jenny, just slightly dismayed, and left wondering about their motivation. thank you for readng me
x
THank you Kate
special? – no
nothing better to do? – I do loads of other things
my sad life? – doesn't feel that way
your taste is better? – quite possible
get a real job? – thank you I have one, there are things left unsaid on this blog
start? – I presume you mean stop
stop living off my husband – I don't
Probably, but in the meantime I have to thank you for providing the perfect illustration of the whole point of this post
…..
Well said!
OK, we seem to have woken a pretty amazing anon specimen here. I can take the bad comments against myself, but I won't have rude comments about my readers, so I think I shall be banning ANON comments for a while.
So sorry for the 'good' anons, but this anon has just proved my point!
Thank you all for your comments and support , I didn't expect quite such amazing feedback!
Dear Ms. Santoni…..
Good thing for you that there's not a dollar-tax on hitting nerves, or you'd owe about 130 bucks as of right now.
Thanks for the obviously evocative posting.
—-David Terry
Ask your followers to not pretend to be a therapist. Good luck to you and your self satisfied blog. Feed a child today. Your pics of flowers are really pretty but do nothing to help those who are less fortunate than yourself. Have a nice life.
P.S. I probably should emphasize for non-Americans that "hitting a nerve" is a good thing.
Another good thing is simply refusing to "take the bait" (as we also say hereabouts) from "anoynmous" folks like the fellow above (perhaps my instincts are off….but the poster sounds like a guy to me).
Not entirely incidentally?….my favorite new line comes from a sketch done by a drag-queen who simultaneously (this is in an edited video on youtube) plays both Cher and Paris Hilton.
Paris calls up to say she's got Cher's new book, and then she rather meanly asks "Who wrote it for you?"
the camera cuts to Cher, who blinks just once, re-arranges her face, lifts her eyebrows, and then cooly asks "Well….who READ it for you?"
As for unpleasant/nasty/baiting-commments?….
Not to entirely lower the tone of this blog, but?…..There's a fine bumper sticker (popular in this college-town) which simply states (with an admirable conciseness I obviously could never hope to match):
"Mean People Suck".
I love that bumper sticker.
Admiringly, and thanks as ever for (as you've read today from your readers) your genuinely lovely and refreshingly straightforward blog.
and here's some closing-advice (which I'm paraphrasing) for you. It was sent to me by the Very Smart&Capable; Dominique Browning when I was being nastily and personally attacked on her blog: "If you write well, and people like what you write, then there will ALWAYS be someone who attack you. That's part of the business." In short?…comments such as the nasty ones above should inspire you to look in the mirror, casually brush your hair back, perhaps freshen your lipstick, and then decalre to your own image "Well, I must be doing SOMETHING very good to be getting this sort of bad-attention".
David Terry
http://www.davidterryart.com (where someone's paid good money to shield my own delicate nerves from any particularly nasty comments).
Aww! Thank you – both of you for being polite but it will not reduce my selfpitty. In my native I'm quite fluent – as an editor and published author of few books I do quite well while my English has reached the level where I can start assessing damage to English language created by myself. And it really make my shy (while it doesn't stop me completely). If nobody is calling for ggrammar policy, I will feel a bit more cofortable and maybe will leave more comments.I will try to "take a stick and BEAT the bitch into submission!!!!" 😀
P.S (2). Having just read one of the very most recent (and, yes….both mean-spirited and obviously presumptuous) comments,it occurs to me that, just because someone has (for once)left-off posting as "Anonymnous" doesn't in the least preclude her still being an Annoying-Mess.
Apparently, "Karen Harbin" hasn't followed your blog so sufficiently as to realize that, if you HADN'T been "feeding a child today" for something around twenty years, "My French Country Home" would be littered with little, starved corpses that looked a lot, for some reason, like you and your husband.
Silly, silly trolls…..
—–David Terry
http://www.davidterryart.com
—-DT
You are a great writer because even such a message about educating others that is not exactly the most exciting to read, you WROTE it so well and funny and witty! and the pictures are very fitting ((:
hats down for you and have a lovely weekend without the "ugly"!
hugs Z
Absolutely and thank you for saying it for the rest of us!
Yes, yes and yes or should I say Oui, oui and oui! I don't believe there is any place for negative comments on "personal" blogs. I've read some blogs that affect me negatively and I don't know if it's because je suis Canadienne but I believe in being polite. If you don't like or don't agree with a blog, don't follow it – in fact, don't bother ever reading it again! As for the spammers, I am thankful that blogger seems to be doing such a good job and dumping them in my spam folder. Fingers crossed but I haven't had any virus problems to date. J
A sad testament to blogging, these creatures are probably sitting in their Mother's basement, in their underwear, wishing they had a life. Not to worry, the rest of us are here and thoroughly enjoy your writing and sharing your life. I have been getting more spam recently, blooger catches most of it.
On reading this I had planned to write that I agree your position is clear and correct. However, I think this point has been amply made by the many others above ; )
Three cheers for everyone who leaves kind, thoughtful, encouraging, funny, and interesting comments on blogs everywhere. May their kind increase.
Fondly,
Glenda
A very good post !! I want to be a good one because I think that you have a gorgeous blog. Keep going 🙂
XO
Anci
I'm new to your blog and absolutely love it. I'm usually one of those good "anonymous" comments but you have most definitely awakened a very nasty giant. Shame on them. I'm 67 years old and nothing should shock me at this time of my life but I am stunned at people's ugly, unnecessary and mean comments. I just shake my head in disbelief that people like that can't see themselves in the mirror for who they are. Let it roll off as they are not worthy to have a response. Keep up the wonderful posts and know that you are appreciated.
Deanie in Texas
Hi,
your blog is great and the anonymous thing is all abou me, not you!
I might recommend your blog to my colleagues/friends and still want not to be tracked down what I commented or not to tell everyone what my personal interest might be, since it's never gonna go away in this digital time. The other thing is obviously that your readers seems to be native E speakers – so it's sometimes embarrassing to left comments not knowing the right phrase or typical expression to the topic. However, your blog is great, loving especially your dog, horse and gardening related topics.
Have a nice summer,
Sari
When I began to blog, when I was burnt-out and broken and fleeing to France a 'colleague' (one who bore some responsibility for my situation), found my baby blog and left vicious anonymous comments. I rather wish now that I had published them with a link to her work e-mail but now my only advice is 'do not feed the twisted Trolls'
and as for the spam, shall I tell you how much malware is spread by infected links? No, maybe not it is too scary
Sharon have a lovely weekend in your beautiful French home and waste not a minute on those few, sad folk
Go Girl!!!
This is unbelievable! I haven't seen any guns to anyones heads forcing them to consciously going to a blog site, reading it then making a negative comment. Why would anyone bother? Perhaps one of them might explain their sad life which makes them waste so much of their own time just to .. I don't know what? Keep giving me my daily 'fix'
Thank you
Bravo to you Sharon for opening up this subject for such a fascinating discussion. Blog trolls are perfectly named, & the fact that they cower behind the wall of anonymity just reinforces that. I just hit the Delete button & don't bother with them. I always have a giggle when I do though, imagining that the Delete button is linked to a fuse & they've just blown them into a million teeny pieces!
Millie xx
One of the possible problems in my experience is that blogger accounts have the security settings so that the 'commenter' has to identify himself. Despite having a wordpress account I couldn't comment on your blog (or any blogger blogs) using the wordpress identity selection. It took a lot of effort to make a comment as the blogger blog repeatedly refused to accept my 'commenter' identity. It could explain why people use anon because I have found that the only one which works for me is the name/URL identity which is fine as I have a URL.Hope that helps!
Good for you, Sharon! I have been trying to figure out a way to do this on my blog, but this says it perfectly (and gently). Would you mind terribly if I reblog this on mine @ https://countrydesignhome.com? I am trying to get my readers who find me via Facebook to add comments on the blog, and not on my Facebook page, as I am trying to build a following. But I cannot figure out why people won't do that. Also, the good news is my blog is built on Word Press, and there is a Widget called Akismet that blocks all of the spam-I never even see them unless I go to the spam page- they have blocked 100's, and haven't been wrong yet! Keep blogging, you're posts are fantastic!!
Honestly, I can;t believe some of the absolute shit people spew. Sorry to swear on your lovely blog, but readings these comments from ANONs got me a bit riled up.
Hello Sharon,I am very dismayed that you have been put through such a negative and upsetting time.I love your blog and may not always leave a comment (for awhile my comments would disappear into cyber space as I got used to this world of blogland!)I am improving and have to say it is wonderful for us all to have ladies like yourself who put so much effort into these blogs.I just love reading your blog.Keep the chin up and the posts rolling!I enjoy David Terry's comments1
Have a lovely weekend.xTrish !
bravo, sharon! well said.
Dear Sharon, I hope you do keep the anon ability to post, I rarely muster the courage to comment, and I can never figure out how to do the other ways besides the anon, I have tried..
May I say you are part of my day, I love to see what you have written and what beautiful pictures you have. Just yesterday, I was looking at a book thinking that you would make lovely books, you have such beautiful pictures, sometimes I put them on my pinterest boards, I always state where they are from, you have a gifted style of taking pictures, very artistic, pictures that inspire me to want to paint them.
I can tell from your blog that you are a kind and gracious person, showing that you have insight into what others are also interested in, our homes and family, and the homes and families of others.
Thank you for sharing your blog with us, it is my favorite. Please consider writing a book, I would buy it,
Dolores West
Sharon …I love reading your blog…thoughts that resonate with my thinking journey and those that push me to look at things differently. The photos are always a great eye candy experience. Folks who put virus laden posts are part of that world community that, for reasons beyond understanding, have a need to be nasty to others…creating havoc and ruining the internet blogging experience for others are, as is the case in all public arenas, folks whose life journey is an unpleasant one. Sadly they are part of the picture of the cyber world.
I am hopeful that there is a way to continue to allow anonymous posting for those who have a need to be unknown – your suggestion to them to have a contact path that is separate from their usual e-mail is a positive and helpful idea.
Thank you so much for providing your stories about families, homes and environments. Kristin
Just had to comment – Good for you! It is sad that these anonymous nasties have nothing else more important in their lives except to write their nasty comments on so many websites and lovely blogs like yours. I guess being anonymous brings them a momentary feeling of power seeing their own words in print. To rain on another's parade, expressing their frustration and jealousy about their perception of various bloggers' seemingly perfect happy lives. So instead of doing something to improve their own lives, they remain hidden and bitter, trying to sabotage someone else's from a safe anonymous distance. There will always be envy and jealousy I am afraid and too easy for a few to express it on the Internet. Glad you voiced your frustration with this and hope you can filter out some of them, not take it personally, and brush it off now as simply another pesky aspect of the Internet world.
You are very brave to share your life with all of us, you have a following of fans like me who love your blogs of your amazing life in France, your beautiful photos. Makes me happy seeing each blog arrive and in my armchair travels I dream of staying at your guest cottage and touring your beautiful Normandy. So happy for you and the life you have made, surely with its own ups and downs like the rest of us. With admiration about your skill and hard work in creating something so lovely as your blog and your life in France to share with us, really.
Alice in Toronto
Sharon,
Darn, I don't have time to read what I am sure are some very interesting and valid points. I am in agreement with what you said and I believe it was said with such tact that no one will be offended in any way. I have a blog and have only received one or two negative comments, but that is because proportionately I only have at any post about 6-12 comments. LOL! I really don't understand truly negative comments because, in my view, you don't have to read anyone's blog and if you don't care for what they say or post, go someplace else. I don't see what constructiveness there is in posting downright nasty comments. Just my Pollyanna viewpoint.
Karen
it is absolutely alright to say it outloud, I wrote two post on the matter of comments.
https://goodlifeofdesign.blogspot.com/2011/06/if-nobody-left-comment-would-you.html
And here is the post with the results of what people had to say…..
https://goodlifeofdesign.blogspot.com/2011/06/bloggers-point-of-view.html
I have been thinking more about this. In our Internet world there is no such thing as anonymity. They leave a fingerprint and you could know by ip address if you so chose to slueth them out, but why would you bother? The delete button is your friend
I love your blog, and have been a silent follower for sometime. Not sure why. Difficulties about registering I think. I took your advice and set up a separate email account just for blogging. I was so inspired I set up a blog as well. Thank you!
I read your blog everyday and it takes me to a place of peace. My dream is to spend a month in France and if that cannot happen I will go via your blog. Your blog has also taken me to blogs that are written in French. I read them thinking I will totally understand the language. I don't of course understand but just a little but I feel like I am there. Your blog is just so calming. Keep up the good work and "don't let the bastards get you down". ( my Father's favorite quote) Maybe you could have a French translate button? Martha
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